The Heart to Serve
My little family of five stood waiting anxiously at the Atlanta airport. The Daraja Children's Choir would soon be landing—Kenyan children, ages 9 to 14, who would spend six months touring far from their families, communities, and the only world they had ever known. Three of the choir boys would be our guests for the next week.
We were excited, and we thought we were prepared.
In retrospect, we were no more prepared than the children stepping off a large machine that had somehow carried them across an ocean they had never seen—and many didn't even know existed.
I remember watching my children watch their reactions to the chaos around them. The flashing lights and warning sounds at baggage claim were enough to frighten some of the children. Others laughed, pointed, and jumped up and down with delight. The sound of a car horn sent one child running. The traffic, tall buildings, overpasses—everything was astounding.
And our children watched their wonder with wonder of their own.
An hour later, we arrived home. North Atlanta suburbia was received as some kind of wonderland, and our house was viewed as a palace.
I was uncomfortable.
We were uncomfortable.
A simple dinner was served: hamburgers on the grill, fries, salad, and dessert. Again, it was received as a feast.
Then came the dinner prayer.
Before we could even begin blessing the food, these young boys cried out to the Lord on our behalf. One at a time, they begged God to bless the Phillips family. They asked Him to provide for us. They thanked Him for taking care of us.
Provision for us?
The family sitting in a home with two extra bedrooms, piles of toys, food in the pantry, and enough clean water not only to drink and bathe with, but to water the houseplants tucked onto bookshelves.
As the prayers poured out of their little souls with passion and sincerity, all five of us were moved to tears.
Humbled.
Then came the garbage disposal, the flushing toilet, the shower controls, and the absolute awe of the washing machine.
Over the next several days, we witnessed pure joy and amazement in everything we shared. We worshiped the same God with songs before bed. We prayed for each other's families.
And the Phillips served.
We served others.
We served together.
One hosting experience turned into two that year. One year turned into three. One family turned into many as we invited friends to participate in the years that followed.
We loved serving.
And as we served together, we formed relationships—relationships that changed us and made us better.
Those relationships eventually led to two family mission trips to Kenya, where we helped lead leadership retreats with the children who we had learned to love. The Phillips Five—our nickname on the trips—packed our bags on Christmas Day and flew across the world to serve the communities of the children who had once slept under our roof.
We met their parents, sat in their homes, and experienced their world.
We were the only family on those trips. There was an occasional married couple, singles in their twenties, schoolteachers on Christmas break—and the Phillips Five.
Each night, the entire team gathered in a circle for our debrief. The exercise was simple:
"What was your picture of the day?"
Some described a child laughing. Others shared about a child learning a new skill. Still others talked about witnessing a little girl, amazed by the opportunity to paint with ninety-nine-cent watercolors, discovering a love for art.
Our children were spread throughout the circle of adults. They weren't tagging along; they were part of the team. They had their own observations, experiences, relationships, and pictures from the day.
All five of us shared our hearts openly with the team, and in doing so, we learned so much about one another. They were stretched, We were stretched.
What had started as a simple "yes" to hosting three boys for three nights years earlier had become a gift, a passion, a rhythm—a lifestyle.
A lifestyle of service.
We were changed.
Each of us was marked forever.
Our hearts were transformed.
We learned humility, generosity, compassion, simplicity, and pure joy.
And we learned those lessons through serving.
Jesus came to serve, not to be served. We are made in His image.
There is something powerful about seeing the world through the eyes of someone whose need you are able to meet. It opens your heart.
There is something special about watching another heart soften because you chose to extend yours.
There is something meaningful about meeting the needs of another simply because you can.
And there is something transformative about leading your children into service.
As a family, we look back on those years and experiences with tremendous fondness. The Phillips Five would all agree that we were at our absolute best when we were serving together. And we LOVED every second. Service was no longer something we did; it became part of who we had become.
Helping Your Family Discover a Heart to Serve
Service doesn't have to begin with a passport or a plane ticket. It often starts around the dinner table with a conversation.
As parents, one of the greatest gifts we can give our children is helping them discover how God uniquely wired them to love and serve others. Ask these questions and listen carefully to their answers. You may be surprised by what stirs their hearts.
What problem in the world do you want to help solve?
What people group do you feel drawn to help?
What breaks your heart?
If you could change one thing about the world, what would it be?
What brings you joy?
What do you enjoy doing?
The intersection of compassion and joy often points us toward purpose.
Maybe your child loves animals, enjoys organizing, delights in younger children, notices lonely classmates, or has a heart for the elderly. Maybe they love to cook, create art, play music, build things, or encourage others with words.
Start there.
Look for one small opportunity to serve together. Bake cookies for a neighbor. Volunteer at church. Pack care bags. Write notes of encouragement. Visit a nursing home. Sponsor a child. Invite others to join you.
You don't have to change the whole world overnight.
But when you teach your children to open their eyes, extend their hands, and offer their hearts, God often changes their world—and yours—in the process.
For Younger Kids:
Free Time: Make a list of questions for your family members. (Favorite color, book, month, subject in school. Favorite place they visited, Favorite memory with mom or dad. Be CURIOUS and creative.) Send the list out and collect.
Fun Time: Make up a game and teach your family or friends to play!
Learn Time: Listen to a book, bible or bible story and draw a picture or journal what you learn.
Love Time: Declutter drawers, toys, games or SOCKS! Create a pile for save, give and throw away! Follow through.
For Older Kids:
Talk Time: Listen to: Riot Starter Podcast Jerrod Gunter and Jonathan Brush – Unbound Podcast to prompt great conversation. Listen here
For The Family:
Team Time: Start a family board game tournament!